As a senior at Cuba City (Wis.) High School, I have checked out some scholarships offered locally, and I have to say that I am disappointed.

Students who are active in their church are greatly looked upon when it comes to applying for money. For some scholarships, the only people eligible must be members of a church and participate in its activities. Now, I believe I deserve a scholarship, because I am an activist in my beliefs, and I have struggled through the many consequences of being an atheist, but no such scholarships are offered locally for people like me.

I thought anything involving the avocations of religion wouldn't be allowed in schools, but there is. If a person attends Mass, follows an organized religion and gets involved in Sunday school, that individual is a candidate for money. That's tolerable, to an extent, but because I am an atheist, I don't have activities, therefore, any scholarships. But that doesn't mean I don't stand up for my convictions every day and try to educate people on what it means to be an atheist.

I am just as devoted, if not more, than other students, and I deserve some recognition, too.

My history with atheism goes back to the summer of 2004, right before my freshman year. This was the time I changed everything I stood for, which was previously anything my friends enjoyed. I had gotten into many disagreements and lost many close pals. In a way, I felt relieved. I could start a clean slate, and during that summer, I started to expand, intellectually.

I became deeply influenced by my sister, also an atheist, and her ideas. She was like a teacher to me, and she began to explain her point of view. Our family has never been too religious. We used to claim to be Catholics, but we never went to church or prayed much, if at all. My sister was the first to stray (to my knowledge) from the flock, and I was impressed by her bold move. She took a lot of flak for it, and once we started to bond, she really opened my mind to the world of atheism.

However, once school started, that was when I was tested. I am the minority at school, and I constantly have to defend myself. During the second semester of my freshman year, I was yelled at and humiliated by a teacher to stand up for the Pledge of Allegiance. When I refused, and the Pledge finished, the teacher took me into another room and questioned my Americanism. Then he concluded by saying whenever the Pledge would happen, I would have to go into another classroom, by myself, and wait. It took everything I had to stop crying and muster up enough courage to take this "meeting" down to the principal's office.

I may have won that battle, but it had many repercussions.

Students whom I considered companions stopped talking to me altogether and constantly questioned my character. I was ostracized for my beliefs, but every morning, when the Pledge happened, I stood my ground (not literally) and sat in my chair. It has been over two years since the Pledge of Allegiance has been done at my school, and I like to believe I had something to do with that.

After the whole "pledge" controversy, I've become more open with my convictions. I have been in many heated debates over religion and have suffered through many students' attempts to convert me and "save" my soul. I am standing up for all atheists, and I assure people that just because I don't believe in God, it doesn't mean I lack morals.

I am a dedicated student who happens to be an atheist, but I get no acknowledgement for it, unlike my fellow religious peers. It takes more will to say I have no faith, and more effort to prove myself to be an upright citizen. I believe all schools should disband any scholarships that focus solely on religion, and they should award students who demonstrate their beliefs, no matter what they may be, more passionately.

The author is a lifelong resident of Cuba City, Wis. When she is not attending school or working at a convenience store, she attends trivia nights and makes movies with her family.